Vy is for Victory

The war is over, and love won. We are finally home. Tired, bruised and battered, but home. E, if you are reading this in Vancouver, we are so sorry that our itinerary was completely changed and we could not meet you on the way home. We were not able to send you a message before now because our computer was stolen! But we will send you something in the mail from Vietnam. I have much to tell you all about the trip, the country and my girl but first we need a Vietnamese restaurant and some sleep! Stay tuned and thanks for all your support during the craziest of times.

at the beach

It's pretty much impossible to write anything when you're alone in a foreign land with a 5 year old, but a tantrum this morning has opened a small window of opportunity! Vy is wonderful and she has definitely bonded with me and is already giving me alot of trust. I could do without the meltdowns, but they are part of the process. We took the train to Mui Ne for a long weekend, and she is loving the beach, just like her mama. Tomorrow afternoon we return to HCMC for the home stretch. I can't wait to have a normal life at home with my girl!

Still not able to post pictures, but trust me she's cute as a button with a smile that melts my heart!

Vy!

Introducing my beautiful daughter, adopted on August 9, 2013 in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam! Her legal name is Suong Mai, which was given to her by the orphanage director when she was found. I learned when I arrived here that she is Vy (like the letter v). I think her Canadian name will be Mai-Lee Suong Vy, and I will call her what she chooses! She is worth all the years of misery and I'd do it all again for her.

I was going to add a photo here but for some reason, it's just not happening (not a lot here happens easily!!)

Must go be a dinosaur, even though I want desperately to sleep!!

one more day

Yep, one more day, but don't think anything starts to get easy at this point! This morning I went to check in online for my flights tomorrow. I have to do it twice, which is the price to pay for a relatively cheap ticket with no code shares. The first time, with WestJet, it was no problem.  Then I logged onto China Southern Airlines, pressed "check in", and got this message: "ticket can but ten and thirteen", with a square at the end. No, I'm not kidding. Fabulous, I have all the time in the world today to crack a code! If this is any indication of how my travels through China will go, I may need that bottle of calming tonic I packed for Mai.

Thank you to everyone who has sent me good wishes in the past few days. It's difficult to explain all the crazy thoughts and emotions I'm experiencing as the time gets closer. It's basically another roller coaster where one second I'm at the peak of excitement, then I plunge into fear and doubt about whether I can give Mai all the things she needs in life, then I flip upside down through a loop-de-loop, thinking about all the ways my life will change, etc. I also can't describe the stress of trying to get a zillion things done right now--mostly things I should have done earlier, but was paralyzed by the uncertainty of adoption and the fear that I would do them and my girl would never come home. But I figure that even if all the things on my list were done now, I still wouldn't feel ready. It's just getting me prepared to be unready for all the big things to come--Mai going to school, Mai getting bigger, Mai becoming a teenager, and all the things after that. This is how love is. It's scary, so leaps of faith are necesary.

Ultimagely, I think that everything is the way it is at this moment for a reason. Mai and Vietnam are my destiny, and just as I committed to fight every day until I had my family, now I commit to doing whatever it takes every day to give my daughter the amazing life she deserves. It starts tomorrow morning, when I crack the code, hitch a ride half way around the planet with the stork, and become the forever mom to the girl of my dreams.

"One day closer till my number comes
We're gonna keep on burning till the night is gone
It's a long ride home."

-Michael Franti